Oh Paris and The Faux Pas of Americains (Started November 15th, 2015)

Disclaimer: I started this piece after patiently waiting. I didn't want to fall into any cliched viewpoint or politically incorrect trap. Sadly, the French flag takeover of Facebook and all social media thereafter drove me into a frenzy. I never published it in fear of a backlash. So now that the year is over and everyone is now holding a light saber instead of being superimposed into a translucent French flag - I'll post.


I feel awful about Paris. I even shed tears. However, I have zero alliance to Paris. Let me elaborate. I've visited for a few days and hours. I've been to all the places that those who have never been hold dear. I generally didn't like Paris and I don't long for it as I do other parts of France. Here's the thing… I find it very hard to believe that terrorism affects places that don't seem like targets. I have to repeatedly ask myself why. This sort of correlates with why does God "take" people and why are we even here. Seriously, why did two towers full of people have to come down? And the even bigger question is why did we have to replace those towers with one bigger, stronger and taller?  I traveled through cities that were occupied by Hitler, bombed, flooded, engulfed in flames and or faced terrorist acts. There was never any evidence. There were no plaques. No monuments. No substitutions. Not even replacements. Things were simply restored to their original glory. Atocha. King's Crossing. Nantes. Only museums, history books, Wikipedia and those that lived through it could ever tell. We, America, are the only country who experiences disasters, wars and terror and take it in a completely different direction. We avenge our flags (the American flag, the Tea Party flag, the Confederate flag), our buildings, our landmarks but never our own people. I never wept for the Eiffel tower or for the French flag. I cried for the loss of lives. France was remarkable in the sense that they immediately wanted to avenge their people. They don't care for prayers, towers or principles. They countered same day. I wish I could say the same for us.

My Flying Nun (Ally, Angel, Savior, Friend)

About a month ago I was gently reminded of how long this journey has been. I was out at breakfast and my phone rang. I had a phone call from someone I hadn't spoken to in a very long time. Now I don't indulge in the idea that once we aren't talking daily I no longer need your contact information. I keep every phone number and business card. I have every physical address book, date book and journal. I am not into the digital business of making space for new and getting out with the old. So boy was I glad to hear from someone who believed in the same. She called me out of the blue and within hours we were talking just like old times. Nothing had changed or did it?

The Things… Nantes

Having been in Nantes just under a month I've already said a lot. Despite all that happened my loyalty lies with Nantes. It always will. There I learned the most about life and people. Nantes is where I learned the most about myself. I'm sure some will believe this learning process came from disappointment. Maybe others will believe it came from some sort of French "enlightenment". I actually learned the most from just being there. From sitting on the trams and looking out the windows. From going into the bakery and watching what the children got. From walking around the grocery store looking for Splenda which doesn't exist. From sitting out on my hotel balcony listening to Kanye West's "I'm In It". Nantes was a period of isolation, self-realization … and awakening. 

The Things… Paris (All Three Times)

Paris the city of lights, romance and love. That is all I went into Paris knowing. Oh and that of "Inception" where the the Haussman buildings fold together in dreams. I had awareness of the Seine and The Eiffel Tower. I knew of macarons and croissants. Chanel and Hermes. That is all. And I am not alone in my sheer ignorance of Paris or France in general. I guess one is fueled by the image of the Paris skyline with the Eiffel Tower in the distance and then the artsy fartsy drawing of the cafes and can-can dancers. Then there is the storybook illustration of lone castles with secret gardens and the French provinces with cobblestoned streets and fields of lavender. Why is France so far from these pictures in my mind? I cannot explain how and why. All I can do is encourage a trip to see nothing is as it seems. For even I have three different experiences in Paris.

City Highlight: Nantes

Let me spring back to my stay in Nantes. Having stayed there just short of a month I had plenty of time to explore and learn about the city. First of all, Nantes is pronounced nahnt. The city is an amazing mix of Medieval old world, Britagne rule and French moderne. I've mentioned how Nantes appeared to be a mini Paris and in actuality it is far from it. Surely, Paris has neighborhoods, historical landmarks and cultural spots but it isn't moving like Nantes. Nantes is bustling yet small. The city is constantly working to NOT be Paris. Nantes boasts an epic public transportation system, a city-wide green campaign and a supportive arts community. The outcome is a city on the brink of next all the while keeping it extremely real and very old French. 

Paris Isn't Burning But It Is Overrated

When it came time to go to Paris I'd already gotten used to the French mystique. So I was not as pleased with the major sites or turned on by it. I'd also grown so tired of French cuisine and longed for anything without butter, cheese or ham. I was also devastated with the amount of money I wasted within Nantes. I'd absorbed enough of France and didn't wager what I needed to enjoy other places. So after too many cafe au laits and tram rides I was lacking for Spain and Italy. Thankfully, there was enough money aside to enjoy Paris for what it was. I walked the same streets as Ernest Hemingway, Coco Chanel, Pablo Picasso and Kanye West. I had Laduree macroons, walked the designers in Le Bon Marche and visited the Lourve to see the Mona Lisa. I've had a 7 Euro sparkling lemonade, paid over 300 Euros for a single night in a boutique hotel and walked over a mile for a noveau vegetarian hot dog. Paris is quite aware of how naive an American can be. They know the majority of us are seeking thrills and amusement. They also know we will pay anything for it no matter how lackluster. It kills me to say this, but Paris is one big amusement park - a sideshow if you ask me. If you are not in it for romance, artistic exploration or spiritual sabbatical you may get what you are looking for.

Frenchy 101

France is a heavenly place. France is a bazaar place. We agreed early on that bazaar was the most ideal word for it. The country is immersed in itself, its people and its random yet welcoming culture. Words cannot describe some of the things I witnessed while within its borders. I can't be sure about the east or south but the north and west of France is nothing short of fascinating. There were quite a few things to learn and sort of get used to. Lets just say travel books and movies didn't assist. There is a sort of reverse preparation you need to handle France beyond the duration of a few days. Honestly, there is a refinement you go into France expecting and you may even hold yourself accountable to simple etiquette. However, just pure manners are all you need. You'll rely upon everyday manners way more than where to put your napkin. 

Traveling The World In A Day Part II

I headed down the platform and remembered all the things my friend had told me. She asked that I not talk to anyone and maintain all my luggage. She told me to hurry down the platform and exit north or Nord as they call it. When I went down the stairs my friend was there with balloons and a cabbie sign. She attempted to give the balloons to some children but they just ran from the gesture. I didn't even have an opportunity to breathe before I was on yet on another train. We passed gardens, a castle, bustling streets. I had planned to just throw down my stuff and go celebrate being 32 in France. She had an orientation at school in the morning and I was delirious. So we wound up at a small cafe near the train stop. There I had my first beer in France and a little dessert cake. I looked out, it was 9 PM and perfectly still daylight. I pinched myself and took a few pictures while she presented me with a birthday card. We then walked a daunting twenty minutes with all my luggage to her friends house. There I wound up finally connecting to wi-fi, taking a shower and passing out for the night. I hadn't been sleep before midnight in ages and then I had to be forced to wake to go to my hotel. 

I was terribly jet lagged. I didn't know what day it was, the time or anything. We walked a good hour total sharing the luggage load to my hotel. It was well off the beaten path. It actuality there was no real path to it, several trams and miles later it was down a hill, around a corner and a complete block down even further. When we walked in there was a thick feeling of no ac in the lobby. Then I get in the room and find no view and no electricity it was all primitive. We figured out that electricity was controlled by the room key and wouldn't stay on no more than five minutes with the key after room entry. Later I found out that wasn't some green or European thing but quite familiar to avid travelers even in the states. Out of the window there was a suburb view on one side and a major highway on the other. I was minutes away from a McDonald's. I had traveled over 10,000 miles in one day for that - a pre-fab fast food restaurant as a view. Later that evening I realized my room had a hidden kitchen which was a big plus considering McDonalds was my only dinner option. My room was so remote I had live chickens as neighbors. I noticed that wi-fi didn't work in my room or anywhere but the first floor lobby area. This was the point where I realized communication was going to be a nightmare. In order to use my phone as intended I had to go downstairs to all common areas for wi-fi. There was an ethernet in my room but only at the desk. The time change was extreme. I couldn't speak with anyone in the states until after midnight and most friends worked or attended school until 9 or 10 at night. So most nights, I would get dressed and go downstairs between 3 and 5 am to text. Oddly, there was a roaming troupe of security guards and someone at front desk at those hours. One night I stayed down there so long I witnessed the baker bringing in bread for that days breakfast. Sitting in the lobby there was no ac but open doors and windows. At night the temperature varied from 40 to 50 degrees. So I sat in this brisk air on a leather chair in lounge clothes. I had no real pajamas assuming I would be in my room on wifi or using my phone. Of course within 48 hours I was sick.

The illness was no virus or bug. It was simply a combination of jetlag, climate change and loss of equilibrium. I spent most alone time not sleeping but barking up a lung and using every tissue in sight. I then gave the bug to my friend and we both lived off citrus, cough drops and donated tissue from local friends. My little kitchen was loaded with market faire - oranges, grapefruit, yogurt etc. It took me a total of six days to get back to normal. I pretty much flushed the sickness with Evian and slept the rest of it away. In that time, I did experience a few outings, met some people and stayed in a traditional French flat. I did all of that quite sick and mentally off because of the time change. If it weren't for advice about sleeping after travel I'd still be on permanent vampire time. I'd just sleep all day and rise at night completely wired. Instead I had to adapt by staying up and busy to sleep at midnight or later and wake when ready. This was also confusing because Europe has a tendency to stay light out past twilight hours. It was always daylight until 10pm so even appropriate sleep for locals seemed impossible. Most people dined at 8 or 9pm and socialized until 2 or 4am on a weekday. 

The best advice I could give is never to travel like I did. Never. Ever.

I would have chosen a more elaborate hotel my first few days. You need something luxurious if only for one day. Allow yourself a traditional setting where you can communicate, get comfortable and sleep well. I should have had in-room wifi since I didn't have a carrier sim for my phone. I should have had access to things around me like restaurants, a pharmacy etc. I should have arrived days ahead of meeting anyone and given myself a proper sleep schedule. Of course there was no way to predict my travel trauma but there was ways I could have prevented it. I didn't properly research my first hotel stays. I didn't realize how long I'd have to lug all my bags to those said hotels. I pretty much thought I was invincible to jetlag and all of the above. Three countries and multiple time zone changes later I now know the consequences. I would also say get a seasonal forecast before buying clothes and or packing. I thought Summer was everywhere at the same time but it just hadn't come where I was going. I was so unprepared for the weather and overstocked on things I wouldn't use for over a month. Six vampire days later I was good to go. Sadly, my first days in France were recovery from my first days in France. My dream turned nightmare and I wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy.

Traveling The World In A Day Part I

My voyage to Europe in one word ... different. I left North Carolina to have a layover in Miami, then I went from there to the UK, took a train from London to France and another train from Paris to Nantes. It was an amazing journey but extremely tiring and at times very confusing. I really tried to pack it all in with absolutely no clue on what I was doing. International travel is hard on the body and senses. The time is changing. The language is new. You may not eat right. Your feet swell. You smell awful. You can't find anything. Seriously read and practice all you want to prepare for it - you can't. I seriously don't know how celebrities and business types do it. My dream of traveling was a nightmare.

Not Nantes - Written April 12th 2013

Today was the first time my travel companion mentioned her destination. Today is also the first day I had some funds to actually discuss travel arrangements. This entire time I've been focused on discussing this a month from now so it was a pleasant surprise to be able to talk about and afford accommodations. She has began to slow up on her own plans and is now encouraging me to accompany her on her weekends off. She won't be done with her French language courses until the end of June. She will be in an accessible city not some remote place as expected. She will be staying in Nantes and the plan is to stay and or visit as often as possible. However it is remote in relationship to France and any other bordering country that is. And Nantes sounds like the word not.