I Got Fired

I was fired a week and two days ago. I have never been fired or let go from a job before. I don't know exactly how to process everything. I was also not given a reason for my firing so I cannot hold myself responsible. I have grappled with the reasons why I may have been fired which makes me wonder about my purpose. I thought that I would be consumed by this and the opposite has happened. I feel free. I have come to several conclusions on my own but I am still waiting for a response. I hope that someone will validate my feelings or tell me where to go. Today I figured I really don't have to wait anymore.

The Things I Lost In The Fire (A Conclusion to the Story)

I won't mince words. I write a blog and it's my opinions and views on what occurs in my life. However, people always get affected by what affects you (hmmm…).That is how blogging works. That is why my blog is unknown to many. She found my blog. I never expected that to happen. Her response to it… to throw away everything I left in France. Oddly enough it was after a great deal of communication about my possessions. A conversation I didn't initiate. I didn't want to be bothered with her. Yet I didn't expect her to stoop as low once she realized we were done. I wish I could say that was all. It would make me feel so much better if she retaliated with just throwing my stuff into the Seine. The problem is she didn't stop there. I don't feel as bad as I did when things originally happened. Now I just feel like I made a series of bad choices. It's hard to talk about. I feel violated. Surely, I lost material things but I like to think I lost so much more.

The Debt Collector

I am in debt. I've always been. Since the ripe age of 19. If anyone would have told me what that debt would do to impair my life I probably would have made better choices. The debt hinders me in so many ways and there seriously is nothing to do about it. Sadly, I don't even have anything to show for it. I basically have one lambskin belt, several pieces of mediocre costume jewelry, a 5pc dinette set, a lot of photos and a reeling mind. That to the tune of just shy of $15,000. I wish I could just pay it all off and be done with it. However, its not that easy. The majority of my debt keeps growing. No matter how much and how often if I don't pay it in full it continues to increase. The reality is I bought crappy clothes, a $300 set, took out a $5000 private loan for school and went on a world tour with a selfish bitch. The odd part is I had the cash money to pay for all of that. I chose to "build my credit". That was the only advice I was ever given.

Why Did You Unfriend Me??

I realized this message belonged to a specific person months after I returned home. I had never scrolled up to try to figure out who it was. When I did I was looking for something entirely different. I'd forgotten about it. So when I found it again, I took the screen shot because things correlated to present day.

This is the first and only person to notice they were deleted and say something. They turned out to be the main person who started the everything in the first place. They turned out to be a person that continually aggravated several situations. I didn't know it was this person when I received this message. The reality is I didn't know who this person was and at the time I had no way to respond. I was in an airport with no service. I tried to reply a million times and I simply couldn't. I kept thinking whoever this was would get a million desperate messages from me beamed down from whatever server way too late. I don't know if that happened or not. The reality is I traveled four countries in less than 24 hours. I came home. I slept. I forgot.

Oh Facebook … Connections and Cut Offs Via Social Media

Social Media can be a gift and a curse. No matter how you use it, there is always some way for it to bite you in the arse. It all starts out beautifully. You only see it as a way to communicate and connect. Soon it's a problem. Well it can be a different problem for everyone and I'll get into that. Just know that social media is a window. All of your online activity is just a window. You have the ability to look out and see other things but your personal online identity is on the other side. You are vulnerable when that thing is open. Not everyone should be privy to that space. Someone may come inside, you could get hit with a rock, rained on or the ultimate burn - a bird could poop on you. Just be aware that the window goes both ways and not everyone is who you think they are and vice versa.